February 9th marks the beginning of the XXIII Olympic Winter Games, and athletes will compete in thrilling events for the coveted Olympic Gold medal.
Here in Washington, DC, there are some Democrats who deserve an award for their “work.” When it comes to hypocrisy, obstruction, and spin, there’s no one more deserving of the gold medal.
Sen. Stabenow: Gold for Best DC Insider
The gold medal for the best DC Insider goes to Schumer’s own Sen. Stabenow. She’s been in DC since 1997 and in politics for 42 years! She’s been in office for so long, butthat doesn’t necessarily mean she’s beendelivering a lot for Michiganders. She’s been enjoying her DC lifestyle while earning a top spot as one of the least effective Senators, passing zero of her bills!
Sen. Heitkamp: Gold in Hypocritical Fundraising
Sen. Heitkamp might think she represents the interest of North Dakota, but her fundraising numbers tell another story. After saying that “billionaires outside North Dakota who don’t know anything about our state shouldn’t be able to impact North Dakotans’ opinions or how they vote,” 97% of her 3rd quarter fundraising dollars came from outside North Dakota. For this, she wins the gold for hypocrisy.
Sen. Casey: Gold in Furthest Sprint Left
The gold for the Furthest Sprint Left goes to “aggressive progressive” Sen. Bob Casey! As he continues to mirror his colleagues like Sen. Sanders and Sen. Warren, he’s no longer the “moderate” he claims to be. This gold medal is a solid reminder of how out-of-touch Bob Casey is with Pennsylvanians.
Rep. Sinema: Gold in Spinning
Rep. Sinema wins gold for being the best at Spin! While she might try to spin her votes as not too liberal for Arizona, it’s clear who she sides with.
She voted against tax reform, voted for the government shutdown, and votes with Minority Leader Pelosi 81% of the time! She now can bring her gold in spinning to her oh so millennial spin class!
Rep. Rosen: Pelosi’s Most Valuable Teammate
Rep. Jacky Rosen earns a coveted award for any House Dem, Pelosi’s Most Valuable Teammate award! Rep. Rosen is happy to be on Pelosi’s team, voting with the Democratic leader over and over again including YES for the government shutdown and NO to tax relief for Nevadans!
Sen. Baldwin & Sen. Brown: Gold in Voting Against Trump
Sen. Baldwin and Sen. Brown win the gold for voting against their states and President Trump 85% of the time. They tied for gold among their red-state Senate Democrat colleagues for this prestigious award, but we didn’t want to leave anyone out, so we’re giving it to both of them since they worked so hard for it. They both tried to deny their states much-needed tax relief, but thanks to Republican leadership, the American people are already benefiting!
Sen. Nelson: Gold in Voting with Obama
Sen. Nelson voted with Obama 98% of the time, earning him the coveted gold medal as the most reliable Obama voter of all red-state Senate Democrats! Sen. Nelson has been pursuing political office for 45 years and has spent so much time in Washington that he will blindly vote with party bosses.
Sen. Manchin: Gold in Hotel Management
Sen. Manchin wins the gold for his hotel management. Despite the obvious problems with his shady hotel dealings, we are still awarding him the gold for best hotel management to see if this will get him to finally answer questions about it! He may pretend to not know what’s going on with his hotels, but he won’t be able to forget about it with this new award he can display.
Sen. Donnelly: Gold in Ineffectiveness
Sen. Donnelly hasn’t been able to pass a single bill during his decade in Washington D.C., so it seems right to at least give him a medal as a souvenir during his time in the Senate. It would be too sad if he left empty handed! Sen. Donnelly is earning gold in ineffectiveness for his inability to pass a single bill.
Sen. McCaskill: Gold in Private Plane Racing
Sen. McCaskill enjoys a luxurious lifestyle, so it seems fitting that she needs a little gold to go with it. She’s earned 1st place in plane racing with her very own private plane that “normal people” can afford. It’s not too hard to earn this spot when you have a $3 million private plane like Air Claire!
Sen. Tester: Gold in Two-Faced Political Games
We couldn’t leave out Sen. Tester as he earns the gold in Two-Faced Political Games. Sen. Tester might act like he cares about Montanans but it’s clear whose side he’s really on. In his award-winning performance, he said funding children’s health care was a “no-brainer,” but when it really counted, he voted to shut it down…twice.
Pitch in to help us beat these ineffective Democrat Senators!
